New House And An Old Friend

This week Dustin and I will finally be moving into our new house, which we were hoping would happen near the end of November. Better late than never, I guess! We slept there Sunday night and last night, which was nice. I’ll have to take some pictures to post here later on. We actually live just a road over from my parents now which will be very convenient when we drop our child off over there or if they have to pick us up for whatever reason. I love that we’re all living in the neighborhood I grew up in now, too!

Tomorrow we will be going to a visitation/funeral for my mom’s best friend Kim….she unexpectedly passed away last year in November but her husband was struggling for a while to get everything together that he needed to have a proper service for her. I can’t believe she died the year after my mom did….I hope they’re both happy now. ❤️💔 We had just started planning my baby shower when she passed away so now I’m going to have to figure out what I’m going to do for that. It’ll work out….I’m sure it will.

Oh, yeah….in about two weeks Dustin and I will finally get to find out the gender of our baby!! I’m so excited!! 😄 We’re not going to do a gender reveal party or anything but we are planning on getting a cake when we find out. I also bought a fetal doppler this past weekend since 1.) I always worry about not being able to hear the baby’s heartbeat at my appointments, and 2.) Because of the pandemic Dustin hasn’t been able to come with me and hear the baby’s heartbeat. I really hope this works because I want to stop worrying about the baby so much!!

I guess that’s about it for now…have a great day! ☺️

Happy Easter!! :D

Yes, in the Catholic church it is still Easter right now and will be for the next 45 days! This year I spent the first day of Easter with my family in North Carolina because one of my cousins (Elizabeth) got baptized this year and I was her sponsor! I got to be right up there with her during the actual baptism, which was such a blessing to me. 

She’s on the left and I’m on the right. 

The service was 3-4 hours long but that’s okay. If you really love the church,  you can handle it,  hahaha. In between rehearsal and the actual vigil, Elizabeth took her brother Tyler and I to see the new Beauty And the Beast movie which was AMAZING! I know there’s some controversy about the gay character LeFou, but I didn’t see anything out of the ordinary in the movie,  just the usual gay jokes that you might see with a character like him. I took my parents to see it when I was back home and they loved it too! For having so many well-known faces in it,  the movie turned out surprisingly well! I do wish they had chosen someone not so famous to play Belle, though…. Then again, I’m a bit biased because she is one of my favorite princesses. Oh,  well. 🙂

Have a blessed evening, my deers! 

Strange day! 

OK,  so… I meant to post this yesterday but completely forgot to!  >.<

I went to see Doctor Strange with my family yesterday, and it was amazing!! (Not just because of Benedict either!)

After that,  we went to mass at one of my favorite local churches for the first time in a while.. It is so beautiful. 

I should have gotten a picture….oh well! Have a great day,  my deers! 

Hello, deers!  

Oh my goodness, it’s been a while!  😮

Quite a bit has changed since I last posted here…for one thing,  I have a job now. ^_^ Also,  I’m starting to (at least partially) dress in mori girl fashion and absolutely love the site YesStyle now! They have so much cute stuff on there and I just want to buy everything on there,  hehe! 

 Oh yeah,  I am also vegan now… I started in October and it was partially because my cousin Elizabeth went vegan as well. I’d been wanting to do it for a while but was kind of scared of how my family would react, even though I had already been vegetarian for almost 3 years. Elizabeth kind of inspired me to do it because she’s even shyer than I am and if she can do it,  I can as well! It’s actually a lot easier than I thought it would be,  but then again I did do it primarily for ethical reasons. 
Here’s a picture from earlier today.. It is raining and I got to wear my hooded poncho for the first time. It’s so comfy! Have a great day, my deers,  and stay warm! ^_^

(Sorry if this is awkward to read, by the way… I have to get used to doing this again!  >.<)

My mother needs prayers.

She has been in the hospital since mid-June because she lost almost all feeling in her left leg, and she was burning up on the inside.  She has already been through so much pain, and for this stuff to be happening to her, I….just….. I don’t know…. I don’t know what to do.  My faith is very much underwater right now because of this. I want to keep it and at the same time I want to become an atheist. This thought scares me. We all thought she was getting better for a while but then she started feeling terrible again….ugh. Please just pray for everyone involved with her situation and that she recovers from everything that has happened to her in the past few weeks.

Dynamite thunder breaks apart the concrete.

A giant fan rearranges my heart into pieces of grass on the wooden-brown floor.

What shattered tears may fall along the way as

I come to stay and never play.

Is it good to cry, to feel sorrow for what I’ve done,

Or is it evil? No, he hasn’t won.

Not yet anyway, and he never will

For the Highest of Kings went upon that hill.

From thence he shall come again

To take away my sin.

Good night.

Dearest Rocky,

I hope you’re with God now. 

All we know is that your pain and suffering is over, 

And that ours has just begun.

Some don’t consider pets as family,

But to me you certainly were one.

It’s so hard to not feel your absence

Especially since you strived to make your presence known.

It must have frightened you to enter that hospital,

Feeling like you were all alone.

The saddest part of all, you see,

is that you didn’t show it to them or me.

You were so unlike yourself today, my brother.

Of course…today was a day unlike any other.

Many tears were shed for you on this icy winter day.

Good night my dearest kitty;

hopefully we will meet again someday.

I miss band. So much. Can I just scream it to the world? No……but I can say it over and over.
I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band. I miss band.

There. Even if I was not the best trumpet-player there (far from it actually), I still loved being part of the marching band show and being around my band-mates. Man….what I would give to have one more day of that. No… more WEEK. A week is all I need. If only it would happen. This song reminds me so much of those competitions that went into the night for some reason, and sometimes it makes me want to cry.

No matter the weather,

we were together.

In both rain and shine,

we were in line.

Those marking feet,

all in time.

Those proud words,



Today my mother and I went over to my [married] cousin Ben’s house to babysit his daughter Isabela, and my step-grandmother Judy came over about half an hour to an hour after we got there. She was going to help babysit, although I don’t know if she knew beforehand about my being there. Anyway, she got there as Isabela was having breakfast and tried to get Isa warmed up to her. That didn’t work because all she got was a stare. Later when we were in the living room, Judy was still trying everything she could to get the 1-year-old to like her. Although it did elicit a grin from her, Isa continued to keep her distance from this strange, eager lady.

“Roll the ball to me, Isa!!”


“I’m on the floor with  you now! We’re all on the floor together!”


“Do you see the bunny? Look how floppy his ears are!!”


Nothing she did all day truly worked.  Isa seemed more than happy to see Judy go, waving goodbye to her as well as pointing to her car outside.

Along with not liking this strange and eager lady, Isa also seems to really enjoy Christian books. She constantly wanted my mother and I to press the button on a book that plays the song, “Jesus Loves the Little Children.” Because of this looping request, it was basically on repeat the whole time we were there.  (Oh, and guess what? She pointed to the windows whenever she heard the word “world”!!)

At one point she was digging through a stack of things and did not stop until she got to the very bottom. My mother thought she wanted a specific book, which Isa did, but it wasn’t related to animals as she had thought. Nope. It was a Christian book!! (“God Loves You” was the title.) Apparently this energetic girl also likes to borrow her mama’s Bible and look through it. Hopefully this positive attitude stays with her when she gets older!

Now it’s time for an explanation. Judy has been my step-grandmother since before I was born, and Isa would have been my real grandmother’s first great-granddaughter. I say “would have” because she passed away a little over 4 years ago. (Wow, has it really been that long?) My grandmother really did not like Judy because of how she was betrayed by her through adultery. She still loved Grandpa but it was harder to be with or around him, of course. Although it took Isa a little while to warm up to Grandpa, it finally happened. This is why it’s so interesting that she seems to get along okay with everybody in the family but Judy. We will see if anything changes on Friday but there are no [positive] expectations.

I really don’t want this to sound like bragging or anything because I am just stating something that my mother pointed out: Isabela seems to have really taken a liking to me.  When Judy tried to bring her out to the living room she did not like that at all, but she got really happy when she saw me and for a few minutes, didn’t want me to put her down. Even if she isn’t acting like that I have personally noticed that she has a tedency to lean against me when she doesn’t feel like crawling/walking around. Maybe it doesn’t seem like anything major to you (and quite honestly, it didn’t seem like anything major to me either until today), but after today considering these little things makes me wonder if these things have anything to do with Grandma or if these two just happen to be really similar right now. I found out through family and friends of hers that I had been her favorite grandchild and that she had apparently talked about me a lot. It’s quite humbling to think about, actually.

The last thing is that my grandmother was a devout Christian and she loved Christian music. She and I would sing along to songs on the Cedarmont Kids cassettes when I was young, which were very similar to the song that Isa continuously wanted to hear today. Again….this may not sound like a big deal to you but there have been too many previous “coincidences” for me to believe that all of this combined is just a coincidence.

Maybe I’m over-thinking things as I have done before but these people are related….maybe, somehow, Grandma reached through to us again with her first great-granddaughter. Wouldn’t that be something?


Happy birthday, Jacob.

Happy birthday, Isabela.

If only he was still here….they would be birthday twins.

At least he is with God and doesn’t have to struggle with his health issues anymore.

Hopefully we’ll get to meet again someday.

Happy birthday, brother dear.

We love you.

Please don’t grow up.

I know how a lot of parents feel now……

My cousin Elizabeth– the one who now has my old Android phone– just posted a picture of herself in a sports bra and shorts on Instagram. She is 14. She is a cheerleader but that doesn’t change the fact that she is my cousin and I want to protect her from the dark side of sexuality.

I hope she doesn’t turn out to be anything like the head cheerleader was from my high school days. I know this is only one picture and that she was in her cheer leading practice outfit, but she has always been so pure…I don’t want to see that innocence leave her. Unfortunately that isn’t realistic, but I pray that she will stay as pure as she can be in her world.

Please be true to yourself, Elizabeth.

My boyfriend is coming to visit in 3 weeks!! I can’t wait to see him.

I know my parents probably aren’t as excited because of how he has acted in the past but hopefully sooner or later they will see that he is better than he used to be. I love him and he actually respects and loves me. Shouldn’t that be enough? I’m probably over thinking things as usual…this visit will only be 3-4 days anyway.

Hopefully I’ll get some pictures and/or videos like I did last time when I went to see him. 🙂


Waiting for the 22nd.

That’s when we go to the airport.

Between now and then I guess I will catch up on a lot of anime and on my video-games.

Thursday was a great day. I had my last class– Writing II– at 2:00 and before then my mother and I went to Frisch’s for lunch with my grandpa at noon. We don’t do things like that with him very much so that was nice. Grandpa also treated me to dessert so I got a hot fudge cake. ^_^ The teacher gave us all candy-canes and I got a Starburst-flavored one. Later, my dad got a roll of sugar cookie dough so we made a big cookie and ate that. Hopefully I don’t gain 20 pounds before the trip, lol.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Right now I am waiting for the Macy’s parade to start.

I am so blessed to have a family to celebrate with, and my boyfriend.

I am blessed to have food and shelter everyday.

The weather is beautiful outside right now so I am grateful for that as well.

Last night my parents went to the Festival of Lights at the Cincinnati Zoo. That was fun.







Today my parents and I went to a local mall to see their new Microsoft store, which was interesting; I would love to have their laptop that has front and back cameras. That would be so cool.


We also went to Walmart after that, and I finally got a camcorder there. Although the screen is tiny and the video seems to have about the same quality as my webcam, it’s good enough for our upcoming trip and that’s all that matters. 🙂

My cousin’s shoes finally came in this morning! I ordered them in September but there was confusion with the address because my card still had my old one on it. Anyway, they’re here! I’m so glad I can finally give her what she’s been waiting for this whole time 🙂

I took this picture and sent it to her on Facebook without saying anything else. I think she’ll be thrilled 😀